Monica Lewinsky Thinks Bill Clinton Should Have Resigned Amid Affair: Biggest Revelations

Nearly three decades later, Monica Lewinsky is reflecting on her affair with Bill Clinton — and the aftermath.

“I think what, you know, what we see now in today’s world and as a grown woman — I hate to break it to any 24-year-olds listening to this, because I know from 21 to, like, 25, you think you know everything. You’re like, ‘I’m a f—ing adult now. I know everything.’ I’m so sorry to tell you, you will look back on this time. I feel like, ‘Oh, little 20-year-old me,’” Lewinsky said on the Wednesday, February 26, episode of the “Call Her Daddy” podcast. “Yeah, no. So you know, I thought it was something it wasn’t, and my feelings were real. And it was very frustrating and painful to have people talking about this in a way that was untrue.”

Lewinsky became a household name in 1998 when her two-year affair with Bill, who is married to Hillary Clinton, was revealed. Bill was impeached by the House of Representatives but was acquitted of all charges in 1999. He remained in office until the end of his second term in 2001.

Years later, Lewinsky is hoping to reclaim her identity. “Even though I will always be defined in some way by my history, I am also defined by my present,” Lewinsky said.

Scroll down to read Lewinsky’s biggest revelations on “Call Her Daddy”:

How the Affair Should’ve Been Handled

After news broke of the affair, Bill made a public statement claiming he had no sexual relations with Lewinsky. Looking back, Lewinsky thinks the aftermath should have been handled differently.

“I think that the right way to handle a situation like that would have been to probably say it was nobody’s business and to resign, or to find a way of staying in office that was not lying and not throwing a young person who is just starting out in the world under the bus,” Lewinsky said. “At the same time, I’m hearing myself say that and it’s like, ‘OK, but we’re also talking about the most powerful office in the world.’ I don’t want to be naïve either.”

Following the scandal, Lewinsky made several public apologies — but claimed she did not receive them in return from some involved.

“I have had a handful of people who were involved at the time that I’ve run into in different ways, who have acknowledged that they wish they had made different choices,” Lewinsky said. “None of the people who were, you know, sort of the above-the-fold names involved in the investigation, and I’m really grateful that I’m at a place where I don’t need it anymore.”

When asked whether there was a time she felt like she did need an apology, Lewinsky replied, “Oh, sure.”

“Well, I think that’s, you know, and that this is sort of something I don’t — I don’t know that I fully unpacked it yet for myself,” Lewinsky continued. “I think a lot of times with the writing I do, it’s like I have an idea for something and I sort of plant the seed and just let it, I’m like, ‘OK, some version of me, it’s figuring itself out to worm it its way out onto a page,’ but I think that a lot of that has to do with the intersection of as my life changed, as people saw me more and more as my true self, as I was able to have more agency, that those things became less important because I have been able to, even though I will always be defined in some way by my history, I am also defined by my present and that’s — it’s important.”

Aftermath of the Affair

Lewinsky had “many” rock-bottom moments after news broke of the affair.

“I guess whatever the layering of, whatever had come out in the news that day, whatever it was, it was just too much,” she said. “And I had remembered thinking, OK, I was able to, the first two weeks of the investigation, I didn’t have a therapist, I couldn’t go on medication. And eventually I was able to get a therapist who had to be a forensic psychologist, who was amazing, Dr. Susan. I’m still grateful to her today. And I remember thinking, ‘OK, I’m going to call her. And if she answers, then I’m staying. And if she doesn’t, I’m out.’ So I think for me, that was rock bottom.”

Navigating her scandal led Lewinsky to become an advocate in cyberbullying prevention. “What I experienced and now why I care so much about anti-bullying with young people, because I understand what this is online and with social media, there is no border,” she said. “It literally feels like the entire world is laughing at you. And it is devastating.”

She Considered Changing Her Name

As she moved forward, Lewinsky admitted she considered altering her name. “There was definitely a period of time that I contemplated it, except, given the world that we lived in, I couldn’t even see a reality of that,” Lewinsky said. “How is that really going to work? I’m going to walk down the street in L.A., where I was raised, and run into someone and they’ll say ‘Monica’ and I’ll [say], ‘Oh, my name is Rebecca now.’”

Lewinsky also contemplated changing her name on her CV but thought she would be recognized if she walked into an interview. As time moved forward, Lewinsky “came to feel very strongly” that she didn’t want to alter her moniker.

“Why should I have to change my name?” Lewinsky said. “I bet nobody has asked Bill, did he ever think about changing his name? OK, I get because he was the most famous person at the moment, and the president, etc. But just even the idea would never cross someone’s mind to a man. I regret a lot of different decisions I’ve made both prior to ’98 and post ’98, I’m a human being. But I’m not ashamed of who I am.”

Lewinsky’s name has now played a role in why she hasn’t dabbled in online dating. “Part of why I haven’t [done] online dating is that whole thing if you don’t want to use your name, you’re starting something out with a lie,” Lewinsky said. “That doesn’t totally feel right to me either.”

Her Dating Life Now

While Lewinsky has “always dated,” she hasn’t been completely successful. “I was somebody who had wanted to get married and have kids, and I’m sort of past that point of having kids naturally, so I think that was a focus for a long time, but it was definitely, my dating life has been complicated, I think, at times,” she said.

Lewinsky said she has had a “couple instances” where people haven’t pursued dating for the right reasons, but she’s confident in her “bulls— detector.”

“There’s a wide spectrum of like how intimacy goes after something like this and it’s like, I mean, thankfully, no one’s ever asked me to wear a beret in the bedroom, but I mean, there have been, it’s complicated,” she said. “Look, I think our comfort level, and it might be generational, but I think comfort level of really feeling like you can own your own sexuality fully can be one layer that many of us go through when you add on the way I was sexualized and humiliated around sex. It makes it more complicated.”

Lewinsky, who does not drink but isn’t 100 percent sober, thinks she may have more intimacy if she consumed alcohol. “I joke now, if I was still drinking, I’d probably have a lot more sex,” she said, clarifying she meant “casual sex.”

Navigating Power Imbalance

In Lewinsky’s mind, power imbalances weren’t something that were “talked about a lot” nearly three decades ago.

While acknowledging this was “not sexual assault,” Lewinsky said, “Therefore, there’s a level of consensuality that was there, and at the same time, because of the power dynamics and the power differential, I never should’ve f—ing been in that position.”

If there was one piece of advice she could tell her 22-year-old self, Lewinsky said, “Do not go to Washington.”