The daughter of a secret service agent has revealed things she would never do to stay safe – including putting her kids’ names on backpacks and having her back to the door in a restaurant.
Ashley Hicks’, 36, dad worked for the Secret Service for 25 years before he retired during the Obama administration.
She was brought up “considering things that other people don’t think about” and was told to never accept a lift from a stranger unless they gave a code word.
Now a mother of two kids – aged two and three – Hicks will never put their names on their backpacks to protect their identity and avoids turning her back when buckling up her toddler in the car seat.
She says she stays “aware” of her surroundings at all times and considers the “worst case scenario” as she “never wants to be caught off guard”.
Hicks, who works in the healthcare sector, from Greenville, South Carolina, said: “I don’t consider myself street smart.
“It’s been driven into us to have a plan,” Hicks said. “I’m more aware than the average person. It’s about considering worst case scenarios as you never want to be caught off guard.”
Hicks remembers her dad drilling “stranger danger” into her when she was young.
“We had code names for pick up,” the mother said. “We were told if someone else comes to pick you up they need the code name. We had no names on backpacks. It was little things to keep us safe.”
Hicks now never sits with her back towards the door in a public space – in case of any fire, shooting or emergency situation.
“My dad always took that position and now I do,” Hicks added. “It’s so you can see. You want to be alert. You want your back towards the wall to be able to visualize the entrances.”
Hicks would also never sell anything on Facebook Marketplace as a solo woman living alone.
If she did need to meet a stranger, she was taught to organise the meeting at a police or fire station.
“My dad always said don’t let a stranger come to your house,” Hicks said. “When I first started dating, my dad would say before you know their intentions to say ‘I’ll meet you there’. If it wasn’t for my dad I probably wouldn’t have thought twice about letting them pick me up. It does take away the naivety of growing up. You’re always preparing for the worst case scenario.”
Hicks was always taught to have a security system and when she couldn’t afford one as a graduate student her dad suggested she put stickers up to suggest she had one – to make her less of a target.
If she has to be out late in the dark alone she will try and park under a street light.
Now as a parent, she understands why her dad was so cautious.
“Growing up I thought he was so overprotective,” Hicks said. “Now I totally get it. A big one is the safety of putting your kids in their car seats with your back turned. If you’re with your kid and by yourself park close to the buggy park.”
“Open the car door so it makes an angle and put your back against the door hinges facing towards your kid. You’re facing your kid but your chest is out towards the parking lot. You can pull the cart in front of you too. No one can hide behind you because of the angle,” Hicks continued.
Hicks will also drill into her kids their names and addresses when they are old enough so if they get separated, they can get help.
Her husband, Michael, 36, who works in sales, will also carry a registered firearm with them if they go out.
Hicks says her dad never wanted to “scare” her but wants them to be aware so they can keep safe.
Things Hicks will never do:
- Have her back to the door of a restaurant / public space.
- Put her kids’ names on their backpacks.
- Turn her back when buckling her kid into the car seat.
- Let a stranger come to her home – e.g. from Facebook Marketplace.
Things she will do:
- Have a security system or buy stickers to make it look like you have one if you can’t afford it.
- Make sure her kids know their names and addresses by heart when they are old enough.
- Prepare for the worst case scenario.
- Park under a street lamp if she is out late at night alone.
