A British tourist walked across the one of the most dangerous border in the world to spent his holiday with the Taliban — and had a vacation fling with a terrorist.
After falling in love with “extreme travel” two years ago, Toyosi Osideinde, 30, has visited 69 countries so far — with an upcoming trip to Ukraine.
After deciding his trips to Iraq, Syria and Belarus were “not enough,” he prepared for his ultimate “dangerous and thrill-seeking” experience — Afghanistan.
His 11 day trip saw the financial adviser from Bath, Somerset in the UK fly into Islamabad in Pakistan and drive to Peshawar, on the border of Afghanistan.
There he entered the embassy to be interviewed by members of the Taliban decked with heavy machine guns, he says.
He spent his trip visiting tiny villages and sprawling markets, eating biryani and even had a fling with a member of the Taliban, he said.
Toyosi said: “The trip was such an eye-opening experience.
“One of the things that astonished me the most was when I was in a bank, I saw a woman working and wearing makeup.
“I then started seeing more and more women in the streets and in the markets who weren’t covering their faces.
“It turns out that whilst some things about Afghani women are true, like having to draw out of education at a certain age, women are still allowed to do things they were doing before the Taliban takeover.
“You’re kind of like a celebrity — the locals will follow you for miles. I would have people following me for two hours just to get a photo with me. Some kids wanted me in their YouTube video. Even in the bank I’d get to skip the queue.
“I was a celebrity, I did not want to leave.”
A member of the Taliban acted as a security guard in Toyosi’s hotel — and they ended up hooking up.
“I ordered some takeaway and he brought it up to my room,” Toyosi said. “I noticed that he kept coming back every five minutes to see how I was.
“At a certain point, I just asked if he wanted to come in and watch a movie. We shared some food and kept on talking. Stuff happened after that and we kept seeing each other every day.
“The Arabs love to flirt with men. They love me — I was obsessed.”
In every country Toyosi had been to, he had used Grindr to find men to date. Saudi Arabia and Afghanistan were the only two countries where he didn’t.
He said: “I was trying to be discreet — you have to be careful. I felt safer with my security guard. We didn’t talk much because he didn’t speak English and I didn’t speak Farsi.
“In the evenings we would watch Gossip Girl. He would love showing me his guns.
“We have spoken since I came back but after some time I had to let it go. The moment I left it just didn’t feel right — It was just a fling.
He says his Taliban lover “was passionate” and “used it well.”
“They are very touchy-feely and like to kiss — it’s romantic in a way. They will make you feel like you’ve known them for years. It definitely doesn’t feel like a hook-up in the Western world.
“Taliban penis should not be underrated.
“I try to have sex everywhere I go. Especially if someone tells me not to do anything there because they are racist and homophobic, I am like ‘Do you know what, I’m going to do it.’”
His trip in November last year saw him spent six days in Kabul and five in Pakistan. The trip cost him nearly $5,300 in total.
Speaking of his entry interview, while crossing into Afghanistan, he said: “I was sat there thinking, ‘this is the end — what have I done?”
Eventually, he was allowed to cross what he described as “the most dangerous border in the world” by foot.
Toyosi visited three provinces in Afghanistan, Kabul, Nangarhar, and Bamyan.
“I felt like I’d be transported to a third world. I can’t even describe it,” he said.
“There was so much going on — machine guns everywhere, you could see the Taliban. There were so many people trying to cross from Pakistan into Afghanistan.”
“You could see people begging on the streets, people pulling each other and others trying to rip each other off.”
Once he reached Afghanistan, he travelled six hours to the capital, Kabul, and checked into his hotel.
“Everywhere you go there’s Taliban. You can’t take a step without the Taliban knowing exactly where you are at every single point in time.
“I was used to this already because it was the same in Syria but this was at a new level. At least in Syria, there is protection — in Afghanistan, there is no Embassy. If something happens to me, I am on my own, there is nobody to protect me.”
Toyosi was told by his tour guide it was illegal to take videos of women and believes that is the reason Western countries do not see Afghani women in the media.
He also claims that there is very little crime in Islamic countries due to severe punishments.
During his trip, Toyosi said he did not experience any racial or homophobic crime.
However on his way home, Toyosi had his passport taken off him at the border and was not allowed to cross as he hadn’t printed off his visa — it was on his phone.
He said: “I had machine guns pointed at my head, and was interrogated 24/7.
“When you try to leave the country, you are put on a list — you are seen as a ‘terrorist’. There are questions are to why you are in the country, and why you want to leave it.”
After he eventually left Afghanistan, he had another two days in Pakistan.
“Four officers with heavy machinery followed me every single step and followed me round. I would walk down the street to get some pomegranate juice and they would have to come with me,” he said.
“There were so many points during the trip where I was like: This is it — you made your bed, this was stupid and now it’s time to die.”
Toyosi manages to fund his trips as a self-employed financial adviser based in Italy. Most of his meetings take place on zoom or teams, allowing him to travel during the afternoon after a morning of work.
He said: “I believe in utilizing my time — working smart and working hard. That has paid for my travel, which can be really expensive.
“I would bring my suit with me and during my meetings I would wear my suit on the top and shorts on the bottom.”
In two weeks, Toyosi will be getting on a 26-hour bus from Latvia to Ukraine, despite the ongoing war with Russia.
“I have a feeling that if I don’t go now, I might not get the chance to go again.”
He also has plans to move to the country of Georgia next month.
