This time, it’s good to finish fast.
Move over Belmont Stakes. An enterprising startup has announced the launch of the world’s first sperm race, in which samples will go head-to-head in Los Angeles to raise awareness about declining male fertility.
This unusual contest was organized by Sperm Racing, a group of young moguls and millionaires who raised over $1 million to back this veritable Kentucky Derby of creative juices, and takes place April 25 at the Hollywood Palladium in front of thousands of spectators, Traded.com reported.
“Two competitors. Two samples. One microscopic finish line,” declared Sperm Racing boss Eric Zhu in his race “manifesto.” The teen tech entrepreneur, who previously founded private market analysis software Aviato, dreamed up the daring event alongside Nick Small, head of business management consulting firm Stealth, Shane Fan, CEO of NFT pricing platform Waterfall, and Garret Niconienko, former content strategist for MrBeast.
The goal isn’t to elicit sophomoric giggles, but instead to turn “health into a competition” and make “male fertility something people actually want to talk about, track, and improve,” per the doc.
In accordance, the mini-marathon will see two spermatozoa — which measure 0.05 millimeters long — race 20cm along a microscopic racetrack modeled after the female reproductive system with “chemical signals, fluid dynamics” and “synchronized starts,” per the document.
Whichever one crosses the “finish line first” — as “verified by advanced imaging” — will be declared the winner.
How fast will the winner finish? It’s yet unclear, but based on sperm’s real-life speed, the race could be over in a flash or last well over an hour.
The swimming speed of human sperm in fluid is approximately 5 millimeters per minute so theoretically these fun-size Michael Phelps’ could “swim through the cervical canal in a matter of minutes or hours,” according to Science Direct.
“The stakes have never been smaller — or bigger,” joked Zhu in a statement.
To make the spectacle more cinematic, these microscopic Seabiscuits will have their every move tracked by high-resolution cameras and live-streamed for fans.
There’ll also be play-by-play commentary, leaderboards and even instant replays while spectators are encouraged to wager money on the race — much like a real-life competition.
“We’re building a market where fans can pick their favorite competitors to see who’s crossing the finish line first,” organizers write. “Whether it’s athletes, or celebrities, imagine backing your icon in the weirdest, most entertaining event you’ve ever seen.”
While this swimmer motility (speed) test might seem odd, Zhu assures that sperm racing “isn’t just a joke” despite being “hilarious.”
Rather, the event was — much like a marathon for breast cancer awareness — created to shed light on the issue of declining male fertility worldwide (you know, for science!). “It’s happening quietly, steadily, and nobody’s really talking about it,” lamented Zhu, who said the goal was to take a “topic no one wants to touch” and make it interesting and “measurable.”
“Health is a race and everyone deserves a shot at the starting line,” he wrote.
Between 1973 and 2018, the concentration of sperm among men worldwide dropped by more than 50% from 101 million to 49 million sperm per milliliter of semen, per the manifesto.
This dip has been blamed on a variety of factors, including obesity, sedentary lifestyles, smoking and exposure to certain chemicals and pesticides.
