DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are the proud parents of a popular, beautiful, charming and usually well-meaning 16-year-old girl. However, some of her recent behavior is causing serious concern.
“Lindsey” is part of her class’s “in” crowd. Still, she’s engaging and friendly to everyone, which is a value my wife and I have worked to instill in her. One boy, “Henry,” is sweet on her. In short, Henry is not exactly in her social circle. He’s quiet, but he gets excellent grades and is considerate and respectful.
Lindsey has been giving Henry the impression that she is romantically interested even though she isn’t. As a result, he’s helped her with many school projects, among other favors. She often has him over to maintain the charade. I’ve gotten to know Henry, and I genuinely like him. He’s a good kid, and I’m disgusted at Lindsey’s behavior.
I tried to talk to Lindsey about it, and she said she’s “just using what God gave her” to better her life. She seems to think that if Henry is happy being around her, she’s not doing anything wrong. I feel I should talk to Henry about this, or at least his parents. What do you think? I love my daughter, but I don’t want her taking advantage of (and possibly destroying) this young man’s heart! — DOUBTING DAD
DEAR DAD: Henry may be happy now, but you and Lindsey both know he’ll be crushed when the truth comes out. This must end immediately. Inform Lindsey that if she doesn’t come clean and sincerely apologize to Henry, there will be consequences. Be prepared to follow through in whatever way you would normally discipline a self-centered, misbehaving child.
DEAR ABBY: I’ve had a college friend for more than 45 years. We’ve had some issues over the years. Because I have a bit of a temper, she has said numerous times that I belong in a mental institution. We had another disagreement several months ago and have ceased all communication. She spoke to me in the tone of voice you would use to talk to a 2-year-old.
I’m now having some medical issues she and her husband are not aware of. We are not young anymore. My dilemma is this: If she or her husband passes, do I go to the funeral? I now use a walker, and if their church’s chair lift is broken, I would be unable to attend the service anyway. I live quite a distance away. — ESTRANGED FRIEND IN NEW HAMPSHIRE
DEAR FRIEND: Nowhere did you indicate that this friend is having health issues. In light of your long friendship, she should be made aware that you are unwell. Tell her you would not want your long friendship to end as things stand.
Funerals are intended as a support for the living. If you would like to attend when the inevitable does occur, contact the person who will conduct the service and ask if the funeral home or house of worship is ADA accessible. There’s no need to stay home due to what might go wrong.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren. For nearly four decades, Jeanne Phillips penned this column, which was founded in 1956 by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 270135, Kansas City, MO 64127.
