It’s been two years since Johnny Gaudreau was killed alongside his brother Matthew Gaudreau, but for his widow, Meredith Gaudreau, it still feels like yesterday.

“It’s just always replaying in my head,” Meredith, 34, told People on Thursday, August 27, of the moment she learned that Johnny and Matthew were struck by a vehicle while riding bikes in New Jersey on August 29, 2024.

Meredith explained, “Sometimes I find myself kinda just zoning out. And I think about what I am thinking about and it’s that night. You know, it haunts me.”

She noted that although some time has passed, Johnny’s death feels fresh as she raises their three children without him by her side.

Related: Meredith Gaudreau Recalls the Final Words She Said to Late Husband Johnny

Meredith Gaudreau emotionally reflected on her final moments with her late husband, Johnny Gaudreau, before his tragic death last year. “He kissed all of us goodbye, just in the driveway of his parents’ house,” Meredith said in an interview clip shared by Good Morning America on Tuesday, August 12. “That was the last time I […]

“It’s playing in my head all the time. I’m thinking about John 24/7,” Meredith shared, revealing she’s doing all that she can to honor his legacy. “I think about him that moment a lot and think about the better moments too whenever I see our kids. They’re a nice reminder to — I remember the nicer times.”

News broke in August 2024 that Johnny, a NHL hockey player, and his younger brother, Matthew, were involved in a fatal biking accident. The siblings were 31 and 29, respectively.

Sean M. Higgins was accused of killing both men, admitting to drinking prior to the tragic accident.

Feature Meredith Gaudreau Writes Letter to Late Husband Johnny 10 Months After HIs Death

Related: Meredith Gaudreau Recalls Moment She Found Out Husband Johnny Had Died

Meredith Gaudreau penned an emotional letter about Johnny Gaudreau’s tragic death nearly a year after he and his brother were killed while cycling together in New Jersey. “I was in shock. I was keeled over for days sick to my stomach,” she wrote of the moment she found out Johnny had died in the letter, […]

In December 2024, Higgins was indicted on two counts of first-degree aggravated manslaughter, two counts of second-degree reckless vehicular homicide, one count of tampering with physical evidence (fourth-degree) and leaving the scene of a fatal accident (second-degree). He pleaded not guilty to all charges and has a pre-trial conference scheduled for September 16.

During her husband’s funeral in September 2024, Meredith revealed that she and Johnny were expecting their third baby.

Johnny Gaudreau Wife Meredith Says Night of His Death Plays in Her Head All the Time It Haunts Me Hockey

Johnny Gaudreau and Meredith Gaudreau with son Johnny and daughter Noa.
Courtesy of Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram

The couple, who tied the knot in September 2021, welcomed daughter Noa and son Johnny Jr. in September 2022 and February 2024, respectively. Their third child, son Carter, was born in April 2025.

Matthew also left behind a wife, Madeline Gaudreau, whom he wed in July 2021. The couple was expecting their first baby at the time of his death. Their son, Tripp Matthew, was born in December 2024.

In the two years since the family’s massive loss, Meredith told People she’s leaned on her siblings and parents as well as Johnny’s parents and siblings as well as her sister-in-law Madeline.

Johnny Gaudreau Wife Meredith Says Night of His Death Plays in Her Head All the Time It Haunts Me Throwback

Johnny Gaudreau and Meredith Gaudreau.
Courtesy of Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram

“We talk about him every day,” Meredith said of her late husband. “There’s things around town here, I’ll tell Noah and Johnny, and Carter of course, he’s just so young, ‘This is daddy’s favorite ice cream place. He used to always get M&Ms on his ice cream.’”

She noted that she also frames “little candid pictures” and puts them next to the places where they were taken, like a photo of Johnny blowing out his birthday candle at their kitchen table.

Meredith Gaudreau Reveals Who Told Her About Johnny Death

Related: Meredith Gaudreau Reveals Who Told Her About Husband Johnny’s Death

Meredith Gaudreau had “a bad gut feeling” before hearing the news of husband Johnny Gaudreau’s death. During the Thursday, March 12, episode of Kylie Kelce’s “Not Gonna Lie” podcast, Meredith recalled the night she found out that Johnny had died. Meredith told listeners that Johnny’s uncle was the one who delivered the news of his […]

“I can see the kids pick them up and can kind of start putting two to two together,” Meredith explained.

Meredith added that she has also kept Johnny’s memory alive by keeping his possessions close by.

“His clothes are all still in the closet. His shoes are on the shoe rack,” she revealed. “[The kids] wear his shoes. They play with his hats. I’ll still wear some of his sweatshirts. I’ve kept everything.”

Johnny Gaudreau Wife Meredith Says Night of His Death Plays in Her Head All the Time It Haunts Me Kids

Meredith Gaudreau with kids Noa, Carter and Johnny Jr.
Courtesy of Meredith Gaudreau/Instagram

Meredith isn’t the only one honoring Johnny and Matthew daily, their mother, Jane Gaudreau, exclusively told Us in April that they were preparing for the 2nd Annual Gaudreau Family 5K Run/Walk & Family Day.

The event, which took place in May in New Jersey, benefited the newly established Gaudreau Family Foundation, created to honor the enduring legacies of the brothers.

“I don’t think people throughout the hockey world — throughout South Jersey to Columbus to Calgary — I don’t think they realize how much they did for us,” Jane shared. “By them talking to us and bringing them into their world and seeing what they could do for us or how they could help keep John and Matty’s legacies alive, they just helped us so much with our grief.”

Share.
Leave A Reply